I love it when I read things that make me nod my head even though nobody can see me nodding my head and then later when I write a little entry on my website I can mention that I was nodding my head and not be lying about it.
What I was nodding my head about.
I stopped writing my silly anecdotes and fake diatribes because they were invariably taken wrong by people who didn't know me at all. And that golden period where I was making all sorts of great friends (and fans) ended when people started mailbombing me and CCing Jeffrey Zeldman (!) when mailing me hate mail for some weird reason. So I tried to jump from egoist to pundit (and failed) and then to some sort of music diarist (and failed) and now I think I'm some sort of quasi-linking-pundit with no real opinions about anything.
Now all my friendships live in AIM or gmail, and I may subscribe to a few new blogs every month, but I rarely feel the desire to make new friends via blogs.
I have to say there's some little part of why FilePile is closed that's related to this as well. Everyone wants a place they can go to hang out and feel like they're amongst friends (notice how I didn't mention the "Cheers" song). I'm grateful that FilePile exists for us and I can't imagine what I'd do if it didn't. If FilePile were like Metafilter, all open and accessible to anyone, we'd miss out on so many of the personal stories and triumphs that bubble up through the ratings system. I have been nearly moved to tears over the death of piler's dogs or celebrated another birth or marriage of a piler with 2500 of my friends. I don't get that with blogs anymore.
Some years ago, we (and I mean 'we' who were seeking online communities), used to dial into several BBSs and juggle friends and meet up for coffee or pizza to trade diskettes or printouts because some of us were on 2400 baud modems (if you don't know how slow that is, you don't want to know), and then the Internet rolled on the scene and for a time we could maintain the smallness of these communities because it was still a bit of work to connect, much less have anything to say once you were connected (see CUSeeMe).
My point that I'm stumbling towards is I think a private blog, a private mailing list, a private community site is where I want to be right now. It's where I mainly exist these days and it's where I can be me—without Jeffrey Zeldman's knowledge.
mat
Amen, Andre
friday
july, 9 2004
Matt
Actually, the signups at MetaFilter have been closed for like a year and a half now.
I get the same feeling you do when reading Ask MetaFilter, because it seems as if my close friends are asking for personal advice. That only works in somewhat small, closed space where everyone is familiar with one another.
friday
july, 9 2004
Andre Torrez
I think because the content of FP is locked away along with signups, it promotes a different level sharing than you'd get on a site that can be Googled.
But yeah, MetaFilter is one of those few thousand sites that have that community feel that just doesn't exist in the comments of the latest Dvorak column.
I am one of those MeFi lurkers who follow and read the arguments and wonderfully debated issues on a daily basis, and feel for all the 'characters' that make the site so interesting. Even quonsar.
friday
july, 9 2004
Steve
Huh -- I don't think the MeFi cast of regulars is that much appreciably larger than it was when I was really involved with the site, but it's all different people; I found myself significatly less tolerant of some of their... ummm... foibles, so eventually I stopped reading the comments, and soon after that I pretty much stopped reading the site. I'm prepared to deal with a community of 50 to 100 very vocal people, but it's hard when I only have history and a mental model of a dozen of them, particularly when the same flame wars about the same things seemed to be repeated over and over again.
(This is not intended as a criticism; I have much respect for the Math Owie.)
friday
july, 9 2004
Matt
None taken Steve, I have mucho respect for the snarkout (and the secret hiding place you hang out at instead of MeFi :)
friday
july, 9 2004
tom
two words: mailing list.
it's like a "push" version of a bulletin board, adding new people is totally word of mouth and online archives can easily be password protected. Also, I find one of the benefits of mailing list to be that email is much more ubiquitous than direct internet connections, since most people can get email on their cell phones now, so it's easy to stay in touch. And it's braindead easy to start a mailing list. no layouts to design, no code to upkeep.
saturday
july, 10 2004
Brian
I've actually overheard people claiming they would give up organs and limbs if that's what it took to keep their FP account.
sunday
july, 11 2004
ChrisA
Offhand, I'd say my favorite torrez period was the "tivo comic" era. Your site around that time(along with fury.com) persuaded me to start my own site.
...
I think I keep my personal site going out of habit more than anything, the page serving duty as a memory surrogate and a personal record of my interests. I've considered taking it private several times, but I've managed to keep the content insipid enough that it's more or less stayed under the radar anyway.
...
While I totally agree with the points, aren't you guys basically referring to livejournal, where clusters of friends revolve around private communities and friends-only posts?
monday
july, 12 2004
dan
without Jeffrey Zeldman's knowledge.
Or Google's.
I used to use my blog as a journal, but I soon thought about having all of that searchable and accessible by anyone, so I moved my journal to a password protected blog where I could write whatever I wanted and my blog became much less personal.
The thing I don't like about completely closed communities is that once you get to know the people in themyou don't get to meet new people.
Speaking of which, I hope you don't close up your blog entirely, because I just found it.
monday
july, 12 2004
Andre Torrez
Oh I'm not closing this. I find it an excellent outlet for ideas and to possibly get feedback. Plus I feel that if you're going to comment and discuss blogs, you really should have one out in the open for folks to see.
monday
july, 12 2004
walter
amen to not closing this. how else am i ever going to know that you burnt a hole in your lung smoking dope in your dorm room? or you watched porn junkies fumbling children from your cubicle?
and, for crap sakes, how can i be this late to the party? what with my new home purchase and cable internet being installed, i am finally poised to start updating the trivialities of my life on a quasi-regular basis and suddenly all the cool kids who did all the things that make me feel warm and fuzzy inside are getting out of the game. yadda yadda yadda....
p.s. if you are so inclined, http://upcoming.org/event/7322/
wednesday
july, 14 2004
dave
Mefi feels like a city out of control, but you can still see 'what it use to be like'.
Filepile is nirvana.
thursday
july, 15 2004
_h diddy
agreed, the closed-in nature of f*l*p*l* is the best thing about it -- met them or not, and i've only met 4 other pilers, those people by and large are friends of mine. i hang out in discuss to talk with them. mefi can get that way, like the thread about the beatles suitcase and things that people have found, when people actually relaxed for a second and had fun. you don't see that much at mefi, people just enjoying themselves in text, but it happens every hour on fipi.
thursday
july, 15 2004